The genre of satire is back, baby, after millions of writers and comedians recoiled from the prospect of doing honest work for the rest of their lives.

“What can I say,” said newly restored comedian Eddie Blanche, “we just didn’t realise how much we love what we do until we started exploring alternatives. On balance I think this is where I belong.”

Cultural touchstones like Saturday Night Live, The Onion, and Private Eye have been revived with immediate effect. The Whale-Lines may or may not continue to publish cat obituaries.