Dear Jezza,

I’ve given this a great deal of thought since our altercation the other day and I remain adamant that Die Hard 4.0 is a perfectly good action film and a worthy member of the Die Hard franchise.

Yes it’s a little rusty, but it wears its agedness on its sleeve. Bruce Willis is a dinosaur totally unsuited to the task at hand — that’s funny. Justin Long is super savvy and knows all about the techy razmataz of modern life, but measured against a lantern-jawed New York cop is a bit of a dweeb. Again, funny. Long is no Samuel L. Jackson I’ll grant you that, but he and Willis have something going on.

Are the action set pieces excessive? Probably. Does the villain (appropriately I forget his name) hold a candle to Alan Rickman or Jeremy Irons? No.

Still, I like it, and I’ll fight anyone who says otherwise. Just name the time and place.

With affection,

Blythe Corker

Dearest Edna,

I am just mortified about how we left things last week. Or rather, how you left me alone with my pants literally around my ankles in the Mission Street K-Mart. You haven't seen fit to answer my calls, my emails, or my incessant knocking on your front door, but I know deep down how you feel.

Come back to me darling. We can make it work. I can change.

Kindest regards,

Blythe Corker