Disney completes acquisition of Argentina

The Walt Disney Company completed its acquisition of the nation of Argentina today, the first step in what is expected to be a full South American takeover.

The $2.7 trillion deal was finalised after weeks of negotiation, with the Argentinian government keen to close after defaulting on the entire national debt.

Disney CEO Robert Iger said: “We couldn’t be more delighted to bring Argentina into the Disney family. We’ve been great admirers since their government became insolvent and are now looking forward to working together on magical new projects.”

These magical new projects are rumoured to include turning the northern half of the country into a theme park - provisionally called Disney Nation - and most of the southern half into an enormous sweatshop complex in which shoddy Disney products will be manufactured en masse.

Iger went on to assure nationals that there will be plenty of opportunities to find work dressed as various beloved Disney characters. Those unable to find employment will be liquidated.